Using an Unreliable Narrator

The following is a short sequence that I've written using an unreliable narrator. Feel free to comment.


I’m a bastard.

I thought you should know this before I got into this whole shitty situation, as it may be helpful to figure out what the hell I’m talking about. She, on the other hand, isn’t a bastard, just so you know too.

All I did was tell her how I felt. I figured being honest was the best way to cut it all off, but I guess she didn’t feel the same. When I told her, she started crying, and I calmly asked her to stop. When she didn’t, my inner bastard came out and I flipped some shit and walked out.

Now, three days later, I’m at her goddamn door and she’s not answering. Pisses the fuck out of me… does that sentence make sense? Fuck if it it doesn’t.

Anyway, I wrote her a letter and left. I think it was a nice one, but hell if I know. It could be heinous by your standards, but to mine it seems pretty damn cordial.

I got in my ford escort and got the fuck out of there.


I used a self-criminalizing technique to undermine my narrator. By the narrator admitting that he's unreliable, or at least skewed, it puts doubts in the readers mind. That, combined with an admitted skewing of the narrators perspective, also in turn let the readers know that it is in fact skewed, therefore making him even more unreliable.

Also, by not including any dialogue, I took away all the 'hard evidence' of the situation... giving the reader only the narrators point of view and inner thoughts of the said events, rather than any inkling of their true nature.

Therefore, I think I've mad a pretty unreliable narrator.

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